maybe we will win the war

i hate to be the person to quote my writing professor like a therapist but:

when it comes to writing, if you can do something else, then do it.

writing is a horrible process, it really is. it will forever make you feel inadequate and deadened and damp because the fire pew-pew of your mind is never ever going to materialize . writing, in its essence, is simply a record of something far greater, far transcendent etc etc. yeah. my brain isn't prepared to spout out intellectualized dictum etc etc. but yeah, all i wanna do is (bang bang bang bang) tell everyone that yesterday i free-wrote esi and alex and norman and xin into real people with wants and needs and conflicts & despite my telenovela-esque plot i am happy happy happy.

also, simone de beauvoir makes me really happy.

and in my proto-slumbering (geez) state i scribbled in this system it is not laws that make (men) right, (man) himself is right. to change things, you cannot change laws, you need to change (man). and was thinking of woolf & de beauvoir & i meant it as a way to justify literature and art (film) against the deluge of (oh-look-at-you-pretentious) criticisms.